I fucjing hate it. I hate myself 4 this whole thing. I can't even ask 4 help. I wanna ask my mom if I could be put into therapy. I rlly need it at this point. Just want therapy so badly to.

How would I even tell my mom about this... I can't go up 2 her and say "Mom I need therapy" or some thing dumb. Maybe I could actually talk 2 her about my problems with my ex?? I don't rlly like lying even tho that is part true but like.. there's my gr00mers n' all that shit. And she doesn't know about that except 4 my problem s w/ my ex.

I'm just so tempted 2 go all over social media and delete them all. Fuckinb Wanna disappear 4ever...

But I can't. I wanna be a artist. Not a fucked up piece of shit. I didn't wanna make this worse. I didn't want this 2 happen. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry

Sorry sorry. Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry... I WISH I WAS DREAMING....

Lol what did you know- I just got internet and a new phone already lmao. Funny timing. (kinda)

Welp.. I guess I can work on my banner now :D

Was hoping I'll be able to do my banner this month but I guess I'll go and do it before next month. Can't do it now because I moved and don't have any Internet :')

Well.. actually I'm staying over at my mom's bf's mom's house (god that's a mouthful) for a while and there's no Internet here anymore so I can't go on my PC and do stuff online with it.

At least I have games on it as well as a GBA emulator that I downloaded games for so.. that's cool. I've recently gotten into MMBN and the games so far are.. idk how to say this but somewhat fucked up? Like.. ironic since it's a game where you play as a 5th grader. The first game deadass featured 2 car crashes in the same scene. And the second game... Should be obvious if you played it before.

I was just surprised while playing it. Especially the ending where it p much talks about abuse. Like how tf was this series not T rated??

Other than all that it's pretty good even tho it has its.. moments.

I just have the other 4 games to go as well as the spin offs(?). But I only have 1-4 atm. So hopefully 3 and 4 are longer because I don't wanna finish them both before we move and get internet. Or before my mom gets data on her phone- then maybe I can use that to download more games. Idk.

Holy shit this was longer than I expected lmao.

ZAMN! MY ART IMPROVED. Specifically the anatomy.

Also for some reason Newgrounds kept doing this weird thing where it'd say "your memory is too low" or whatever and I would be forced to reload the fucking page and I was nearly done w/ the list but when that happened AGAIN while I was nearly done, it got rid of everything so I just gave up and went "you know what? Forget it." and ended up not doing it. It's probably my PC tbh.

I'll go and do it again whenever I feel like it, though. Just wanted to post this news/blog here before it does it yet again. So surprised that this year passed by so quickly!

Will update my account for 2022.

Already have my pfp set but I just need to make a banner to go with it. My pfp would probably be temporary though.

how do are you spell word?

My Life has been going to shit recently.

I just want this whole thing to be over.